Thursday, December 8, 2011

♪♫ This Use To Be My Playground ♫♪

♫♪ This use to be my playground
This use to be childhood dream
This use to be the place I ran too
Whenever I was in need
of a friend.....

This was my home after my father died. It was where I lived until I got married. It was where my children went to play. I have so many fond memories there. It's been over 20 years that this house has been in my family. That's a long time. A long time to make memories. A long time to put down roots. This was always home. Even after getting married.

My daughter asked how that was possible the other day. I told her I had 2 homes. This one, I grew up in; and the one I have with her daddy, her, and her sisters. She look puzzled. I told her one day, she'll grow up and get married. And she will make a new home with her husband. But even though she'll have that home, that this place now, will always be home to her too. She looked like a light bulb went off in her head. She got it.

After this weekend, this home above, will no longer be home for me, in any way. My sister is moving, and we are all saying goodbye to it. I'm helping her move. I'm so very happy for her. But at the same time, my heart is breaking, as is hers.

This house was our shelter for so many years after my father died. It's where we all became women, me and my 2 sisters. Where I learned what family means. Where I learned about love.

We held neighborhood dances when were younger in our garage. We made it a roller skating rink from time to time too. lol Once, when I was 15 (or I just turned 16), I got my moms van stuck in the garage. How do you get a van stuck in a garage you ask? You get in there parked perfectly sideways. Yup! lol

And Oh the parties as we got older!! lol We threw some good ones. One time, we literally had to have a list and bouncer. If you weren't on the list, you didn't get in. What was suppose to be a small party wasn't. Word got out, and got out big time. And yes, we turned people away that night. We had too.

There were nights in the 20's when no parent in the neighborhood wanted 7 or more of us kids in their house, so we bundled up and spent it out doors. This house is where I discovered stars, on nights like this one. When it was clear and cold out, laying out in lawn with our friends (since no one was letting us in), gazing at the stars, and talking. Moon bathing.
I learned about friendship. And sisterhood.

This house is where I learned to dance in the rain, literally and figuratively.
I got my first kiss here.
My husband proposed to me here.

I'm not sure how this is going to go this weekend, to be honest. We are all so full of excitement as my sister is moving just up the street from me, and will quite literally, be my neighbor. But at the same time, we have this sadness inside us. We know we must try and "say goodbye" to our past, in order to move into our future. It's not going to be easy. But we will always have our memories. And our hope for the future is bright. And that hope will be what we cling too.

The future is exciting and new. I can't tell you how excited I am to have a sister for a neighbor. And you should see my kids! They are super excited to be so close to their cousins now.

I'm not sure how others families are. But we always seemed pretty close to most our cousins. Even to this day, all the ones on my mom's side of the family are here (did I mention one is considering moving into the neighborhood too?), except one. And she visits as often as she can. We are always at family gatherings and holidays. It's just the way our family is. It's the way it's always been. They aren't some distant relative you barely speak too. They are friends. We are actually trying to plan a "cousin's night out" before Christmas. We all (and our spouses) are going to go to a new piano bar that just opened up recently. =)

Anyway, my point being, that my family has always been close. And I love that my kids are growing up just as close, if not closer, to their cousins.

It's never easy letting go or saying good bye. And we may be letting go of building that has come to mean so much to us, but we'll always have our memories. Always.


♪♫... Don't hold on to the past
Well that's too much to ask...

....This used to be my playground (used to be)
This used to be our pride and joy
This used to be the place we ran to
That no one in the world could dare destroy
Say goodbye to yesterday
Those are words I'll never say .... ♪♫


  1. You made me cry. It feels wrong that I don't get to say goodbye. So many beautiful memories in that house. How many summers did I spend there? How much trouble did we get into together? From playing with Barbies in the playroom to Vanilla Ice blasting in the garage, nearly breaking my tailbone on the trampoline, drinking Zima, Heather chasing me down with a spoon, almost fighting J in the front yard on New Year's Eve, passing out on the living room floor the same night, hiding in the attic (inside Heather's closet). There are too many. Maybe I'll do a drive-by while we are in town for Christmas and say my goodbye. Love you!

  2. I remember you driving the car into the goal post!