Saturday, August 9, 2014



When someone you love causes you pain by being careless, over and over again, is that worth it?  Is it worth the relationship?  (parent child, spouse/significant other, friendships, and so on)

I would love to sit in a room of people and debate this topic right now.

Turns out, I had time to think and reflect.  And a scripture came back to mind:

Matthew 18:21-22
21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”
22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.

When you look up "scriptures about forgiveness" you are bombarded by the answer to my question.

Matthew 6:14-15

For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Well that scripture alone says it all, doesn't it?   If you want forgiveness, then you must be willing to forgive.    Pair that with the Matthew 18:21-22 scripture above it, which tells us to forgive loved ones over and over over again....  Seems pretty clear to me.   No where does it mention a clause for NOT forgiving. 

How many times must we grieve the Lord?  How much do we hurt him with our choices and sin?  And yet, scripture says:

Isaiah 1:18 

"Come now, let us reason together," says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.

Hebrews 10:17

"Then he adds: "Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more."
 Daniel 9:9
"The Lord our God is merciful and forgiving, even though we have rebelled against him;"
He is so very faithful to forgive us.  Shouldn't we then exhibit that same behavior and forgive.  

Mark 11:25

"And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins. "

Matthew 6:9-15

"This, then, is how you should pray: " 'Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name,  your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.  Give us today our daily bread.  Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.  And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. '  For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins

We all screw up.  We all make mistakes.  And some of us, make them out of carelessness.  Or perhaps out of a passionate moment when emotion runs a little wild.  Or perhaps we made choices without really thinking them through.  Or we have and didn't care in that moment.  But it is clear we are to forgive... over and over again.

Isaiah 53:4-6 

Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.

He knows our pain!!!  He sees it.  He feels it.

Romans 8:28 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

First Peter 5:7 “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”

 Go to Him with your pain.  And let go and forgive. 

I think that sometimes it hurts more when you are hurting because of someone you love (parent/child, spouse/significant other, friend, etc.).  Most of the time the people who love you though, don't hurt you out of malice.  They don't do it intentionally, the way your enemy would.  They may have been careless. They may have made a mistake  They may have been over come with emotion in the moment and unable to have self control (which is something we all must work on on some level, is it not?).  I think that perhaps, wounds made by loved a one, although they may sting more; should be forgiven more quickly then those made those out to purposefully harm you.  Because after all.... You love them too.  Just as we wound our heavenly Father daily, and loves us and forgives us.

Give your pain to God.  Let Him handle it from there, and let go and forgive.  Not always easy, sure.  But it will be worth it in the end.  And I think, maybe perhaps....  If we practice to forgive often enough, it will become easier and easier to do.    


Is it worth it?  That was my question.  And I find that yes, yes it is.  Because we love them.  And if we are really blessed, they love us too.   Love is always worth it.

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